Known him since year 1, foundation year. Didn't know him too well, but thought he was quite a nice guy when the first call he made to me was to warn me to come to class to show my work to prof before he penalized my grades.
In year 2, we both got into film major, he was like a shifu, teaching me what Im interested to know about camera and lights. I managed to work at equipment store from his recommendation. From then, he gave me plenty of opportunities to crew for him.
In year 3, despite being under him for quite some time, I was still learning very slowly and not serious in improving myself, always taking things lightly. He started to get strict with me, or mean or sarcastic. He always scolds me when I screw things up but according to a friend, he once advised others not to scold me, finding excuses such as I'm already very stressful to handle so much things. A friend described our relationship as love-hate relationship.
I was very nervous on a breakthrough project as a director of photography. He then appeared, stretched out his hand and gave me a very sincere handshake, telling me good luck.
In year 4, he continues to be blunt with his words, especially so to me. When a concerned friend told tale to him about me putting producing as my first choice (a role which I've never taken up before) and director of photography as my second and advised him to talk to me, he texted me to ask if I've considered properly. Because of these kind concerns I received from my friends, I changed my choices.
He started to see the the effort i put in for FYP and also according to a friend, told the others that I'm slow but willing to learn.
At my classmate's shoot in Penang, there was one night out when a big black dog suddenly charged out towards my direction. He was beside me when I gasped. Almost immediately, he pulled me away towards him. He is someone who is afraid of most animals, even a cat, but when the dog charged out, instead of shunning, his instinct was to pull me away. I was really touched.
During my FYP as producer, I cried one night because of the stress from the crew, partly because of him who made some demands about supper. When he knew that I cried, he joked to give me a hug with his arms stretched out. He also took out the sponsored C300 canon video cam which is to shoot his FYP from his car to let me 'play'. I felt like a kid instantly, in front of an elder brother.
During my FYP as director of photography, he had been there for me, to recce locations with my team, to discuss and advise on my lighting plans, to get the crew under us to stay back to black cloth windows, to do midnight shoot and still come on set early next morning despite asking him to take shifts. Even he himself exclaimed why is he doing so much for me. I expressed my gratitude to him that moment and told him I was really touched.
When he got to know from my friends that i cried because my Asst dir got nasty to me, he texted me a msg to me to tell me not to worry and that i have done a good job so far. The nxt morning on set, he told me to stand next to him and said he will shield me if the asst dir tekan me. She really came to rush us and he said a few words to her and she left us alone. After the shoot he told her to reflect on her nastiness to the crew. She came to apologize to me. He had also told her that she should know how my working style is like and she should accommodate to it. I was surprised to hear that he defended me again.
For my pickup shoot, due to some admin issues, we couldn't check out lighting stuff from store which would have cost a bomb if we rent from outside. He was concerned and helped me called up rentals and asked for quotes to meet our team's budget. He also suggested to me that he could help me get some equipment out from store. (He has power in the store and our store supervisor trusts him). It is illegal and he usually won't do that, but he did that for me.
Checking in the equipment wasn't as easy. He wasn't there and supervisor didn't trust me due to bad impression from round 1. I texted him for help, to talk to supervisor. He called, they talked and he once again settled things for me.
Few days back, I thanked him for everything he has done for me and confessed that he is the most blunt but actually the most concerned one.
I thanked God for putting this friend beside me, to see me through these 4 years, someone whom I thought is a mean friend but happens to be my support. Thank God for giving me an elder brother, a guardian.
Ho'oponopono - Heal ourselves before healing others
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Thursday, November 15, 2012
The Power of God.
I always always have stage frights... especially when it comes to presenting in front of my adm filmmaking course mates. I always come up with weird ideas in my mind to escape presentations; falling sick, fabricating excuses, class got cancelled etc. But none of these happened...
Yesterday, I prayed to God, to give me the strength to be more confident. Ive always tried to negotiate with him so that I dont have to present but the more I bring it up, the more he pushes me to do it. Slowly, step by step, I presented from 3 presentations in mid terms to the final presentation at Producing class.
As usual, was very nervous before the presentation and practised a few times until I was comfortable. I totally shocked myself when I didnt have any script and everything came off my head when I presented our mood board and other location pictures. And another thing that shocked me was all my 5 slides are pictures, no words to refer to. The last thing That shocked me was I felt comfortable throughout the presentation, all smiles, loud and clear, though with a little trembling voice.
It was really a big relief after the presentation and yes, I did feel really good. Last week, our lecturer announced that he would be raising the stakes for the presentations. The team who has the best FYP short film pitch will get some sponsorship money, though $250, which is like 1% of our budget, is really good and encouraging enough for us. The class votes on the best pitch and he will decide who gets it.
After all the presentations and lectures, he announced that the winner goes to 'Full Out'. Though I have expected we will be one of the few in contention for the prize among the 10 groups, I let out a big gasp, literally, mouth widened upon hearing our project name.
Even without the prize, I felt that Ive won, especially in winning myself. The prize was a bonus for us, a recognition of our creative efforts. I'm really glad and God is the first whom I thanked, who gave me the strength to go on and most importantly, made me feel comfortable in front of my course mates.
Everytime after I got over the feeling of dread due to bad things that have happened, I will make a point to thank God, sincerely, because I believe what is conveyed in the picture below is true.
Ho'oponopono - Heal ourselves before healing others
Yesterday, I prayed to God, to give me the strength to be more confident. Ive always tried to negotiate with him so that I dont have to present but the more I bring it up, the more he pushes me to do it. Slowly, step by step, I presented from 3 presentations in mid terms to the final presentation at Producing class.
As usual, was very nervous before the presentation and practised a few times until I was comfortable. I totally shocked myself when I didnt have any script and everything came off my head when I presented our mood board and other location pictures. And another thing that shocked me was all my 5 slides are pictures, no words to refer to. The last thing That shocked me was I felt comfortable throughout the presentation, all smiles, loud and clear, though with a little trembling voice.
Mood Board
It was really a big relief after the presentation and yes, I did feel really good. Last week, our lecturer announced that he would be raising the stakes for the presentations. The team who has the best FYP short film pitch will get some sponsorship money, though $250, which is like 1% of our budget, is really good and encouraging enough for us. The class votes on the best pitch and he will decide who gets it.
After all the presentations and lectures, he announced that the winner goes to 'Full Out'. Though I have expected we will be one of the few in contention for the prize among the 10 groups, I let out a big gasp, literally, mouth widened upon hearing our project name.
Even without the prize, I felt that Ive won, especially in winning myself. The prize was a bonus for us, a recognition of our creative efforts. I'm really glad and God is the first whom I thanked, who gave me the strength to go on and most importantly, made me feel comfortable in front of my course mates.
Everytime after I got over the feeling of dread due to bad things that have happened, I will make a point to thank God, sincerely, because I believe what is conveyed in the picture below is true.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Bathing Babies
How meticulous... ha
Removing the dead roots and parts and replanting them
Dad and his babies...
Now clean and fresh!
Sunday, September 23, 2012
DIY Business Card!
Previously when I went to pitch for sponsors, it didn't incurred to me that I have to prepare business cards for effective referral.
It was until I pitch to this boss of a crystal shop. After the pitch, he asked for my business card so that he can refer myself to his boss. I told him I didn't have one and at that moment, regretted not having one.
My friend suggested to me that I can design my own business card and send it for printing at Peace centre. To save money and time, I decided to do everything myself. After spending one night that stretch to 4,5am, I'm done with my design, the template for my business card.
Then I went to buy this green hard paper at some art craft shop at a dollar. There were like 10 shades of green and to select the most matching one, I took a black piece to match with all 10 pieces.
While being excited to try out, I was afraid that it would turn out bad, the ink or paper might mess it up. To my surprise, it turned out well and I went on to print 9 more!
Having done with the tedious and meticulous slicing of the paper, my business cards are out! What an achievement for me! haaaaa
Friday, August 10, 2012
6 and half years
'I call you when I see my family.' was what she told me before departing.
Few days before she said I must come and send her, and I did. I'm as excited as her. Her son was primary 6 then. Now he just entered University.
Ytd night she cried, called out 'Girl...' and hugged me. Instantly my tears flowed too. Just one word and her emotions infiltrated into me. I patted her shoulder and scolded her for making me cry.
6.5 years not having seen her family. It was her choice, to pay for her brother's medical fees, to help pay partially for her husband's car, to buy land. During this period, she shared with me a lot of her stories, bitter, sweet or horror... Ha
She's coming back in one and half month. Her contract ends next year Dec. She will choose whether or not to cont upon her family's decision. Mixed feelings, to want her to cont yet knows she has her own family back there. But it's alright, I can still visit her if I want to! I hope I would be able to make a trip back to her home with her next Dec!
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
中毒了
我好像又中毒了！这次喜欢的竟是个男艺人，小鬼黄鸿升。其实，我这样做是故意的！不太认识我的人也就不会误会我是同性恋了。哈，开什么玩笑！我真的很喜欢他啦！以前我有看娱乐百分百的，但是他主持时比较少看了，对他的映像几乎没有，连名字也不耳熟。我还问周围的朋友人不认识他，几乎每个都懂，连我姐也懂。
第一次听到他跟阿恩合作，我就在想他是谁啊。看到他的照片或戏等都不觉得他怎么起眼。本来是想找阿恩在娱乐百分百被提到的片段，看着看着，我就沉浸在这个节目中。我对他慢慢有些好奇。小鬼在娱乐百分百展现了他最真实的一面，很幽默，很可爱。喜欢他大笑，傻笑的时候。已经看了很多集的娱乐百分百，他和小猪和蝴蝶实在是太搞笑了，很喜欢他们的搭配！
本来觉得小鬼很幸运，能跟阿恩拍戏，现在反而觉得阿恩太幸福能跟小鬼合作！
从觉的小鬼那么不起眼到觉得他太有魅力了！
第一次那么喜欢一个男艺人，不知会持续多久？哈！
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Commitment
Simba is really a cutie, though he bites and scratches a lot when he is excited. I love him when he purrs, when he brushes against my skin, when he plays hide and seek with me, when he enjoys me stroking his neck with my finger and especially when he does his business obediently.
During this 6 days, I tried as much as possible to keep him company, to play with him. This actually made me have second thoughts about having a pet. I would really hope to spend as much time with them as possible, but I know it will be quite difficult. I know I can't commit in the long run and I wouldn't want to see them in a corner of the house, feeling lonely and having no one to play with.
And parting is definitely the most painful thing. I can't imagine how much tears it would cost me if it leaves me. Having spent only 6 days with Simba already made me cry a few times when i think about not seeing him around in my house again and that he is going to end up as a hall cat hurts me more. I wouldnt like to commit to this additional emotional investment...
你虽是只过路猫，但你在这六天里让我很快乐。
During this 6 days, I tried as much as possible to keep him company, to play with him. This actually made me have second thoughts about having a pet. I would really hope to spend as much time with them as possible, but I know it will be quite difficult. I know I can't commit in the long run and I wouldn't want to see them in a corner of the house, feeling lonely and having no one to play with.
And parting is definitely the most painful thing. I can't imagine how much tears it would cost me if it leaves me. Having spent only 6 days with Simba already made me cry a few times when i think about not seeing him around in my house again and that he is going to end up as a hall cat hurts me more. I wouldnt like to commit to this additional emotional investment...
你虽是只过路猫，但你在这六天里让我很快乐。
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